TIS' THE SEASON: A FEW POINTERS TO ENSURE IT IS AMAZING!

Tis' the holiday season, where it all should be about joy and happiness. To ensure that you have an amazing holiday and set yourself up for success in 2014, here are a few pointers.

• indulge but don't overindulge..the former leads to enjoyment, the latter will only fill you with regret

• lead with kindness and kindness will find its way back to you

• give more than you receive and you'll be amazed at how good that feels

• you have a choice to be positive regardless of anyone else's drama. You can escalate or curtail any situation from getting out of hand.

• laugh a lot, and then laugh again, at yourself and with others -- never at others.

• smile inside, and outside. It will make you, and others feel wonderful.

• even if you get a gift that you don't need/want, be grateful. You still have more than most of the world's population

• be patient, and kind to strangers or personnel in a mall, a store, a restaurant. They are trying to do their best on very busy days, so try to make their day a little easier. 

• enjoy the company of friends and family, even if it gets a little overwhelming at times. 

As Bob Marley said Don't worry, Be happy. Enjoy the moment, and create memories to last a lifetime.

Best wishes to all for the holidays and I wish you a most amazing 2014. And thank you for reading my blog as I know that there are many competing priorities for you during each and every day. I truly appreciate you listening to me. See you in 2014. 

Cheers

Patricia

THE POWER OF THE RESIDUAL SMILE

Have you ever found yourself smiling when a memory surfaces about something that happened perhaps a day, a month or a year ago? Usually it is because someone made you feel special, did something extraordinary or perhaps a get together which was filled with joy and laughter.

When we have such memories, you can't help but feel happy. And when you feel happy, the "happy hormones" kick in -- serotonin, endorphins, dopamine, phenylethamine -- resulting in us feeling good, and actually becoming healthier.

Luckily, I have many times to which I can think back to that make me smile, and yes it does feel good!

Life is about creating memories or should I say good memories. 

I am not big into new year's resolutions, but perhaps you can consider making a pact with yourself today to make a life resolution, which is I will do things which I know will result in others smiling today, but also having residual smiles when they think about what happened for some time to come.

When you create residual smiles in others, you will create them for yourself as well. Happiness is, as happiness does.

A RANT -- COMPLACENCY AND IGNORANCE AT SENIOR LEVELS REGARDING WOMEN

This is a rant. This rant is courtesy of a recent survey of Canadian executives wherein the results indicate that most are not concerned about the number of women in executive ranks or on their board. This after study, upon study, that shows companies that have women on boards and with greater representation in the executive level, show better financial results. So how is it that still there is this outdated, neanderthal thinking that "hey, we're good. Leave good enough alone."

One of the executives in the article (a female unfortunately) states:

“I do think that it makes sense to have diversity on a board, and it would be great to have a woman on our board, but it comes down to whether there would be someone who would be suitable to join.”

Argghhh! Really? I'm sorry, but if you don't think that there are highly qualified women who can bring a lot of insight and experience to your company than you haven't been looking very hard. This is the same excuse that has been used to exclude women and others from the boardrooms and C-suite for decades. "We just want to have the best candidate, what's wrong with that." 

Well guess what? There is nothing wrong with that. The reality is that the best candidate would often be a woman, but you haven't made the effort to find her. You have done the normal search or maybe gotten one of your golf buddies, someone that mirrors who you are and how you think to participate in your company. 

Some people use the example of the new CEO of GM or the CEO of Pepsi-Co and a couple of others to say "See, a woman was the best candidate and therefore she got the job." My rejoinder to that would be there were probably a number of qualified woman for those and many of the CEO jobs across the world, prior to these amazing and qualified woman breaking through.

I wrote about philharmonic orchestras in a previous blog (Blind Auditions) wherein the exact same argument was used by symphonies to explain why there weren't more (or any) women in their orchestra. "Gee, if only women were as good as men musicians, we certainly would have some," was the refrain. However, not surprisingly, when blind auditions were instituted, wherein the "hirer" could only hear the music and not see the player, the number of women suddenly increased. Do you think that was just because magically women all of a sudden got their game-on and were better musicians? No, it was because systematic discrimination was built into the process.

When I was working at a company where we needed a new supervisor in one of our major distribution centres, my team presented me with a shortlist of guys for the role. I indicated that I would not sign-off on any hire, unless there was a woman in the mix. They didn't have to hire the woman, but they had to have one who would be considered as a candidate. After two weeks they came back and said they hadn't been able to find one. My response of "So sad, too bad" and that the role would remain vacant until they were able to consider a qualified female applicant. Another couple of weeks went by, they found a woman for the role, whom they interviewed. I did not interview any of the candidates, I left it up them to hire the best candidate. 

Well, they ended up hiring the woman for this supervisory role. And guess what? In six months, my team indicated that she was the best supervisor in this distribution centre, and on top of that, she changed the dynamic amongst the entire team, and it was better for it. Had I let them just hire those who were "easily" found, we would of ended up with the same-old, same-old. Instead we ended up with the best. Unfortunately the only reason she ended up being hired, was because I was in a position to make them look for a woman. Not hire, but look.

I do not advocate quotas because that usually sends the wrong message. But I strongly suggest that anyone who is hiring for anything, whether a supervisor in a male-dominated industry or function, for any role, but particularly for a  senior leadership role or for the board, that there is, at minimum, one woman put into the mix for consideration. Perhaps even just have "blind auditions" as suggested in my previous blog. I guarantee you that very quickly women would start populating the corporate landscape in all sorts of roles, because the best candidate for the job would be hired and she would be great!

(note: you can also read "You've come a long way baby, or have we really?" for an additional perspective)

RETAIL DISCOUNTS ARE DISTORTING THE REALITY

I went out Christmas shopping today. In the mall, every -- and I mean every -- store has signs 40%, 50%, 60% off. Wow, what deals! Or are they really?

Let's face it. Retailers are making healthy profits. They are not in the business of saving us money. They are in the business of taking money from us for their advantage. So, why are they giving us such "great deals?"

When I was younger, I worked part-time in a store. Nothing was discounted prior to Christmas. Well maybe a few items on Christmas Eve day to entice those last minute shoppers (which were often desperate husbands, to whom we could pretty much sell anything. We actually had some sport with that, trying to figure out what the wife's expression would be Christmas morning when she opened up the big package, only to find a ratchet set and drill -- yes we convinced men that the wife would love it! :)

Now, everybody goes shopping with the expectation of deep, deep discounts, all the time. Have we been such intelligent consumers that the retail industry just buckled under the pressure? Not so much.

Yes, there is increased competition. No question about that. But I actually believe that the answer lies elsewhere. The "original" retail prices have been severely inflated, and the "real" cost has come down significantly with all the off-shore manufacturing that is taking place.

The retailers are still making a bundle, and consumers are paying higher prices, that have the illusion of being discounted. We are probably paying more, not less, than in the proverbial "good-old days."

This attitude morphs into the business world as well. The old style of negotiation was the seller would go high, the buyer would go low, and inevitably they would meet in the middle -- an arduous, adversarial process but everyone usually got what they expected. Then buyers (not all but many) were hit with an epiphany of realization that this was just some silly game and that it was better to be more upfront, partner oriented and negotiate openly and transparently. This is how I always liked to negotiate -- I wasn't into the gamesmanship nor in making a supplier bleed for my benefit, because inevitably they are there to support the business and we need their support.

Unfortunately I see the tide reverting. Buyers are looking at sellers and stomping their feet and saying we need more from you. They don't differentiate between products or services. Everything is painted with the same brush. Buyers will often get some short term gain, but their business will inevitably suffer with this approach -- because there are so many value-add things that sellers offer, which will make your business better.  But not if you put them in a choke-hold. I will tell you that I have predicted the comeuppance of some companies that I have dealt with in the past who thought it was appropriate to hit suppliers over the head with a 2x4. Karma is a bitch!

But why are we reverting. Today, in the mall, I felt I had the "AHA" moment. Buyers don't trust sellers anymore, because everywhere they turn outside of their work life, everyone is offering huge discounts. Which means, ergo, that at every other time of the year, when you shop and you pay retail price, you are obviously being ripped off. So buyers in corporations are probably figuring that their suppliers are holding back some secret stash and that they are not being honest with them when they say that this is the best they can do -- and still be viable.

I know a lot of these companies who are trying to do right by their clients. They are going into sell the cost savings  which is being pushed on them from on-high because, well their leaders go to the malls too!

best possible product/service, at a total cost which ensures that the client gets what they need, plus the service that goes along with it. These sellers though are in a conundrum because it is unclear to them how they can appease the sometimes ludicrous asks of the buyers. And the buyers are making ludicrous asks, because their metrics are stilted towards the demon

I know it is not this simplistic, but we do live in a discount society. I fear however that we are going to go back in time when we stop being honest with our partners and begin the silliness of "you offer the high price, and I'll give you the low. And we all know it's a game but hey, if I can tell my boss that I got a severely discounted price, I'll get accolades and a bonus!"

As Kurt Vonnegut wrote in Slaughterhouse-5…and so it goes!

WE ALL NEED A LITTLE MAGIC

I remember when I was a child and Christmas time was the most magical time of year. I wholeheartedly believed that Santa was real, reindeers could fly, and that if I implored Santa and his elves, that I would get the new stuffed animal that my heart desired. I went to the mall and told Santa that I was indeed nice most of the time and hopefully that counted. I mean, even Santa was probably not nice a 100% of the time!

To believe in the realm of the improbable is acceptable in children, but seen as folly in adults. 

The Christmas season has become for many, not the favourite time of year, but indeed, the most stressful. The right gifts, the right dress, the right food, too much food, too much drink -- need I say more?

When you are a child, you are not bothered by these extraneous things. You see Santa and you see magic. You believe without doubt that there is this corporeal being in a red suit, living in the North Pole, amongst the elves and the reindeers, with his only job in life to bring joy and goodwill to all, once a year. You believe that there is a master list being kept of all your transgressions to determine whether you'll be on the naughty or nice list, and that has long been a great respite for parents during the latter few weeks of the year "Don't be bad, because I'll have to tell Santa!"

So this year, I made a pilgrimage to the mall to see Santa. I wanted to see if I could recapture some of the magic of Christmas that seems to leave us as adults. The Santa at the mall where I went, has all the makings of the real Santa, a real beard, and the twinkle in his eye. We had a nice little chat -- I went during an off-peak time when there was no line-up, as I didn't want to keep any children from their idol!

I sat down beside Santa. He mentioned that it had been a long time since I had last visited him to which I obviously had to agree. Hmmm, how did he know that I didn't do this every year?  Anyway, Santa did suggest that I was on his nice list, and I was going to say nothing to dissuade him of that notion! But you know as I sat there, I felt that wonderment that I had a child surface a bit. As I left, he gave me a candy cane, and a chocolate Santa, and said with a smile I don't want you to wait so long again before you come back to see me!

And I remembered the joy of Christmas that had been like a warm embrace as a child.

We all need a little magic in our lives. To believe in the spirit of the season, and not the consumerism. To remember that the greatest joy is to give to others, not just gifts but of yourself.

Life itself is magical, and we are too often wrapped up in the push and pull of competing priorities to enjoy the moment, and the magic.

Magic is not an illusion, because it is you that makes it real.

Maybe you might just want to go see Santa this year and create some magic for yourself!